THE OFFICIAL SLAP YOUR CO-WORKER DAY!

Tomorrow is the official Slap Your Irritating Co-workers Holiday:Do you have a co-worker who talks nonstop about nothing, working your last nerve with tedious and boring details that you don't give a damn about? Do you have a co-worker who ALWAYS screws up stuff creating MORE work for you? Do you have a co-worker who kisses so much booty, you can look in their mouth and see what your boss had for lunch? Do you have a co-worker who is SOOO obnoxious, when he/she enters a room, everyone else clears it?Well, on behalf of Ike Turner, I am so very very glad to officially announce tomorrow as SLAP YOUR IRRITATING CO-WORKER DAY!There are the rules you must follow:You can only slap one person per hour - no more. You can slap the same person again if they irritate you again in the same day. You are...

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Extra! Extra! Chili Finger Discovered! Fast Food Horror!!!

NOTE - PLEASE TAKE THE SONGBIRDS POLL IN RED ON THE RIGHT - THANKS!---------------------------------------------------------------------------------I know that I said I wouldnt blog until after Ja-me next posts, but I had to get this off my chest. I saw on the channel 7 news that a human finger was discovered in a bowl of Wendy's fast food chili today in San Jose, Ca!!! Go Here To View The News Video: ABC7 News Top Stories Here's the run down: a lady in her 20's was happily eating her chili (just as I do almost daily). She got a really good spoon full and stuffed it into her mouth. She tried to chew the savory meat chunk and noticed she couldnt bite through it. She promptly spat the thickness out into a napkin and peered at it. And there, in her napkin, lay an inch long finger complete with...

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"Beat Them Kids!" My Reply To Your Comments~

Y'all are way too much! I loved reading your comments! My replies were getting kinda wordy so I decided to make them into a new post.Unfortunately kids dont come out understanding that they should revere authority/parental figures...it must be taught!!!Praise to all you parents out there that have not crumbled every time your kid cries and tells you they hate you because you wont give in to ridiculous requests that will hinder their growth....Like my Pastor says, "you either pay now, or you pay later...with interest!"A Quick One or Two:My friend actually almost got into a fight with a lady in a grocery store because she saw that the womans little boy was knocking items off the shelf onto the floor. When my friend commented to her about her child, the mother had a fit and started cursing her...

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Just Leave Me Alone With Your Bad A$$ Kids For Like 5 minutes…

Oh the wonderful blessing that is technology! It’s Sunday afternoon and I’m at a gig waiting for my turn to sing. To pass the time I’ll write about my issue this morning at Church on my handy-dandy PDA.I love my church! I love my Pastor, the diversity, the fellowship, the Praise and Worship team , the staff, and seeing all of the wonderful ways God is using this church and the lovers of Christ in it!Today I learned that there is one small element that I do not like. I DO NOT like rowdy a$$ kids and their insensitive ass parents. (This is not restricted to church, but to ALL public facilities such as movie theaters, restaurants, etc.)If you happen to be one of said insensitive parents, I do not apologize for this rant. Rather, I’d like for you to use this post as an overdue wake up call.It’s...

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blah, blah, blah

What it is yall, Whatzup, (whatzup) Can a playa just keep in (in touch) … Sorry blame it on the late night BET (uncut) videos (note to self don’t ever watch this isht again) I have seen some chicks do some things I didn't ’ even know were possible (okay so maybe I did know about some of it). Anyway, after a 60-hour 6-day work week my version of Sunday afternoon has finally arrived. It’s Thursday night at 4:20am and as usual I am wide awake (even after two glasses of wine…which may explain this post…No J, drinking alone does not make you an alcoholic).I don’t know WTF is up with blogger tonight. I can’t seem to comment on anything.So I’ve been reminiscing about things I miss and would like to experience again (probably a result of the wine) so I figured I’d share.I Miss- Saturday morning cartoons....

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How To Crush A Crush?

Let me start by saying that Curvy's post was hilarious! Check her out if you dont already know...click here - "Powerful Curves".So lately this new vanilla guy (a tall one!!) at work has been diggin on me (and this is not scabby upper lip midget guy who happens to still be sporting the red ring around the lips). I dont know what it is. Around spring/summer I usually attract men of Middle Eastern decent so this is something new.I work with the guy and he came by during the week I was moving on up, (movin on up) to the east side, (movin on up) to a deluxe sized rat cage in the sky....oopps! Jefferson flash back (take this Jeffersons' quiz).Anyways, I was moving up to the "better side" of the office into a "larger" rat cage with a "view", when the guy comes up to me and starts talking to me. I've...

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Attention All Squirrels

After reading Ja-me's post I can tell that this week is going to be a challenge. I'm feeling sooooo out of it. I've been stuck in this whirlwind of emotions and I'm sick of it. I've been brooding over past expectations for my current life. I cant help but feel very disappointed.How the hell did I get here? I wont get into any deep details, but let me tell you that I cant allow myself to believe that my purpose in life is to rot away in this rat cage. Dont get me wrong-I truly do appreciate all of my blessings, but so much is missing.I wanted....hell, I WANT more for my life. I dont care to be a billionaire (though I wouldnt complain if I were), I just want my job to be my passion, to be financially comfy and if possible meet someone who isn’t completely deranged. I dont think I'm asking...

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Venting

I can’t sleep!!! After tossing and turning for the last three hours I decided to give up the fight and just get up. It’s 7:30am and I’ve been up since 12:00pm yesterday. That bastard Mr. Sandman has left me in bed alone, awake, and bored once again. The control freak in me seems to think that she can change my schedule and make me sleep at night on my off days (and during the day on work days)but I guess it didn’t work tonight.Anyway, I got to see my favorite comedian Paul Mooney at a small comedy club in SF with Chops, Jame and my mom (which was a bit odd because she is very conservative) last night. I can’t even begin to tell you how funny he was but that was really no surprise. Not much else to say about that (plus I’m sure one of my cohorts will elaborate) but I do have one question....

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Lambchops 102 Things

I'm not sure why anyone would be interested in these personal details, but since BEG's been bugging me about it, I've decided to do it. I suppose there may be more to me than my issues with my ex-midget :-)I love God!Jesus is my Lord and SaviorI still make A LOT of mistakes, but thank God for grace and forgiveness!I'm obsessed with electronicsI dont really know very much about fashion labels or designers I just know what looks good on me I'm not usually very girly,but I do have my extreme girly daysI LOVE the guitar,my interest really got peaked when I saw my good friend Paul Fox (aka Foxy) play the guitar when I first joined the bandI think Paul was the greatest guitar player EVERPaul died in a car accident on the way to one of our gigs in DecemberI was devastated...I still amBut I'm not...

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Queen Of The Midget Men

Hey BEG. I'm finally blogging so you can stop leaving me those vulgar and rude messages - thank you very much.... On second thought, keep the vulgar, lose the rude :-)FYI >> I'm adding a few links to this post, so click on any underlined words<<I'm beginning to wonder if my ex - Mr.Waste Of Space Circus Midget - left a scent or stain on me (sorta like when a dog pisses on a tree so everyone knows he was there - you get the point). Reason being is that ever since we split the only guys that I seem to be attracting are of the midget variety. Now, dont get me wrong. As I've stated in almost all of my posts, I have NO PROBLEM WITH THE VERTICALLY CHALLENGED. Unfortunately, I am jaded so I probably wont be dating anyone under 5'4 again (I'm 5'6) - probably. I'll never say never (I said...

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