Finally

The grinch has officially left the building. I can't even begin to express my excitement right now!!! In exactly 6 1/2 hours my vacation begins. For almost 2 full weeks I will get to trade in my vampire membership for a normal existence. Do you know what that means! Sleeping at night instead of during the day. Going out on weekends to places where I am not 1 of the 4 people on the dance floor (that are usually unemployed or otherwise impaired). I'll actually know what day of the week it is for a change (usually what you consider Tuesday is my Fridays and what you consider Fridays is my Monday unless I am working one of my off days which makes my Tuesday...... well, let's just say I'm usually all fu*ked up). It also means not panicking every time the damn phone rings because I'm worried that I'm being called in to work. Maybe I'll actually try ignoring caller ID for a while. ( On second thought perhaps I'd better not) Anyway I am happy, happy, happy!

After using every excuse in the book I made my return to the gym. First I told myself I'd go back after it stopped raining but it's been raining off and on for three weeks now. I decided to take the direct approach by getting dressed and driving to the gym without thinking about it unfortunately, when I got there I couldn't seem to get my lazy ass out of the car. What finally motivated me you may ask?? Well, I made the mistake of trying to squeeze into some jeans I hadn't worn in a while and sad to say...... after a few hours I couldn't feel my left foot (lack of circulation) . So, my first (and only) workout so far was terrible. I started out on a treadmill next to a 70 year old man. After jogging for 15 minutes I was sweating profusely and panting like a dog in heat (sad I know). The guy next to me was running faster than I was and hadn't even broken a sweat. Bastard! Anyway, after completing 35 of the 45 minutes I planned to run I finished my pathetic attempt at a workout and headed home. For some unknown reason I was in pain the next day. Figures.

Since this is my last day at work for a while I guess I'll end it with a call. (This call was taken by another dispatcher so this is my interpretation.)

Caller: (Enraged male caller) I am sick of this. I know you fu**ed my brother!"

Dispatcher:(confused) "Sir, do you know who you just called?"

Caller: "Don't play games with me!"

Dispatcher: (irritated) "Sir, this is the police department."

Caller: " I know you f**ked him, I saw the stains on the sheets! Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about."

Dispatcher: (amused) "Sir, you dialed the wrong number this is the police department."

Caller: "Whatever!! Don't call me anymore. It's over between us!" (caller hangs up)

END CALL.

To Lambchop: "I like her ban(k)gs."
To Je-Me: "Eat the food Tina!"

Posted in: B.E.G's Posts